I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
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