just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Randomize
