im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Randomize
