just come out here and I will go home with you...
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
