im drinking this country out of the recession.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Randomize
