Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
