one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
