guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
well you can't waste a boner
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
