For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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