he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
