Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
