the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
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