I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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