This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
