Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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