I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
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