Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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