I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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