Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Randomize
