If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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