I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
