I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
NoShamevember. You game?
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
