never play flip cup with pint glasses
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Randomize
