idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
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He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
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Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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