i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
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Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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