I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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