Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
