He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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