3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
