I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Randomize
