So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
