i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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