Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?

(770): View more from Georgia

I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.

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(801): View more from Utah

My underwear smells like fireworks.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(571): View more from Virginia

Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar

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(719): View more from Colorado

If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.

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(952): View more from Minnesota

Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.

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(870): View more from Arkansas

I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster

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(604): View more from British Columbia

I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.

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