doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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