its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
i dont even know how to be here
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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