so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
