sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
