I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize