There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
