drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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