Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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