YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
The power of my boobs compel you
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
