I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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