If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Randomize
