Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
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It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
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