I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
