I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize