No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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