i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
