someone get that fucking seahorse.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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