Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
